Namesake: Tai

I have had a lot of petname/ namesakes since I was a kid.

The most common one and the one that my family still uses on me is Kuttu. Kuttu means small -- I think I was a tiny / scrawny kid and so the name suited me perfectly. Suresh is not able to get into the habit of calling me 'Kuttu'. Probably because he never knew anyone calling me that for the first two years that we were friends or maybe because I was not tiny or scrawny when we met. Even after we were married he found the name 'Kuttu' rather weird. He kept saying -- 'Why did they name you Rohini if they wanted to call you Kuttu' - Good point ... I am not sure.

In college (i.e. 11th and 12th) I was often referred to as George. i.e. My last name. I had friend who would yell 'Hi George - over here' at the railway station and I would turn around and look knowing that the yell was intended for me. George also became 'Georgie -porgie' and other fun variations.

And then for a long time there was none. Till maybe about 2007 when I got my first job.

The first time I was called 'Dr. George' over the intercom - there was a certain sense of pride that I cannot describe. I almost felt that there was nothing else that could feel like that sense of pride. I quickly tried to land back on earth by insisting that people call me Rohini as opposed to Dr. George. Dr. George felt like a namesake .... it did not really feel like me  ... but someone else ...like 'Kuttu' just described my stature. Still on and off I got a call to be Dr. George!

Few months after I quit  my job and we moved to India, I got my latest petname. This one I think I love more dearly because of what it means and how I wish it will last on me forever. I was sitting on my rocking chair when the Cook called out. 'Tai - come eat before it gets cold'. I though she was saying 'Danny - come eat before it gets cold.' She repeated this two times and Suresh came to me and said ... 'Well why arent you eating?'
Me: 'huh'.
Suresh: 'She is talking to you'.
Me 'No she is talking to Danny'
Suresh:' Hahah. No she is saying 'Tai''
Me: 'Oh! What does Tai mean?'
Suresh: 'Mother'
Me:'Why is she calling me 'Mother''
Suresh: 'Its like saying breast feeding mother or young mother'
I am not certain if this was true. Suresh sometimes does make up weird stuff! But I liked the sound of it. I realized that I was holding Ziva and Isaac was running around. For all official purposes - I was 'Tai'. A new petname.
Once in a while she calls me Mam, which I absolutely hate since she is close to my mother's age. Tai is just fine!

 

Signing with Ziva!

We have begun teaching Ziva 'signs' and unlike older brother she picked them up pretty quickly. Isaac did not relate his signs to words till about 14 months. However Ziva has now at 12 months starting using them to communicate with us. I guess she has a good teacher. No I am not bragging about myself because she is learning to sign from Isaac.

When I had started homeschooling a few months back, I came across this nice website that spoke about introducing signs to kids. The cirriculum on the website was more suited for 1-2 year olds but I thought it would be fun to go through some signs with Isaac. As we started revising some of the old signs like more, eat and milk, I noticed Ziva observing us very carefully. So we (Isaac and me) turned our focus to Ziva. I would teach Isaac some signs and when Ziva showed up he would in turn 'show off' his new sign. I think in a little while he too realised that she was trainable and kept repeating things to her.

Ziva now shows - more, milk, eat, cheese and all done.
This morning she learnt 'all done' and I gave her a hi-fi for it. She decided she had earned the olympics medal and went between Suresh and me hi-fi-ing us continuously!


Video of Ziva and Isaac signing

"Where ignorance is bliss, 'tis folly to be wise."

The curious case of Indane: Ignorance is bliss till you realize how much money you spent unnecessarily.

It has been a year since we moved back to India. It has been 11 months since we started living in our current house. But last month was the first time we received government gas

In India there are three forms of cooking gas available.
1. Government gas: HP or Indane
2. Private Gas
3. Black
I am still not entirely sure what the difference between option 2 and 3 except in our case 2 was delivered by a nice guy and 3 by what could closely be described as a thug!
The main difference between option 1 and 2/3 is a price difference of about Rs. 600. So why did we not get the option 1 as soon as we got here. Well because the entire acquisition is a really convoluted method where you must have address proof but you just cannot get address proof because you have no address proof.

Here is our story
October mid : Suresh moved into MIMS ardendale and started to get his utilities settled in. Anywhere he went they asked him for a government address proof which was either
- an electricity bill: which in our case was still with the builder, or
- a land line telephone : to acquire which you needed an address proof
- a drivers license with your current address: which we realized would require us either going to the RTO and paying some guy off or going to a driving school who would 'pay off' some guy in the RTO (Pay off = BRIBE)
Suresh finally sought help from the kind property manager (who I would call a 'thug' myself .... suresh says he is just caught by his circumstance of having to please 90 villa owners) who set him up with Option 3. The Gas guys shows up (i.e. Option 3) charges Suresh a deposit of Rs 2500, promises him a gazillion things like instant service even at 2 am at night etc etc. So we end up with a gas cylinder from the 'thug'.
I land in Banglaore a month later and  in a matter of few days we realise that we cannot have just one gas cylinder especially with two kids and not way to tell when the cylinder is close to empty except to count days! So we call the 'thug' and ask him for a second cylinder. He charges us another Rs 2500 'deposit' and gives us a second cylinder.
Life continues as usual till the gas runs out. We call Mr thug and he comes with a new cylinder and says gas price has gone up ... it was Rs 1000 last month it is Rs 1100 this month.
Next month --- gas price has gone up it is Rs 1200 and then again a month later, gas price has become Rs 1300.
I finally felt the whole thing fishy and decided to ask a neighbor --- This was probably the first thing I should have done anyway! She said that private gas was Rs 800 and I could get it from a reliable source called 'J' and that if I was paying anything more I was being cheated.
Tubelight! We were being taken for a ride! How naive! No not naive --- how stupid --- how ignorant. I decide it was war time and called Mr. Thug.
He comes all happy to deliver another cylinder and I am sure was going to tell us that gas price was now Rs 1400. Instead and I bring out the two empty cylinders and ask him for our deposit back. Mr Thug is shocked. He says he doesn't have the money with him at that moment --- but he can take the cylinders off my hands. Huh! Yes thank you! Why dont you kick me in the rear while you are at it.
After arguing with him for a while we realised it was pointless. So we let him go and told him to come back with the money in a week's time.
One month later we still had two cylinders with us! We decided to use some threat action. We told the property manager, who by now we knew was friends with Mr. Thug, that we were planning to go to the cops since Mr. Thug owed us Rs 5000. A few hours later Mr. Thug sends his older brother  Mr. Thug2  who was far more uncouth than Mr. Thug himself. After an hour long of shouting outside our door where Mr. Thug2 kept telling us that he had only Rs 1500 and we had to just take it and return one of the cylinders ... and us not budging from our position of  'Give us Rs 2500 and take your cylinder', we finally go Rs 2500 and had one less cylinder in our house. But the problem did not end there. Mr. Thug2 promised us he would return with the remaining money in one week and pick up the second cylinder.
Another month passed and still not sight of Mr. Thug 2. I had lost my patience with Suresh too. I had begged and pleaded of him to go to Mr. Thug 2 's shop and get the money back. Suresh loves saying that the only way to straighten crooked people in India was Lathi charge .... but he never does much about it. One of these days I am going to hand him a 'Lathi' to see what he does with it.
I finally picked up the empty second cylinder and put it  in the car, put Isaac in his car seat and drove to Mr. Thug 2's shop. When I reached there he pretended like he didnt know me initially. After arguing with him for about 45 minutes he finally gave in. In the 45 minutes that I refused to budge from his shop step he told me it was really uncouth of me to yell in front of his shop. Interesting he did not think of this when he was screaming outside our door. He told me that it was very unlady like. I told him I didnt care - I needed the money back.  45 minutes later I walked out of the shop with Rs 2400 - He told me Rs 100 was for prompt delivery of the gas cylinders and charges for his petrol.

I got into the car and drove for two minutes -- stopped my car and counted the money three times. I was shocked that he had given it!

I have taken on the new name of Jhansi Ki Rani !
I have decided to ask when I do not know how to do things!

PS: One thing I forgot to mention -- Why do I think our property manager was a thug -- well during our many arguments with Thug2, he let it slip that he had to given someone 'Chai pani' (-- i.e. a commission) to get the business's from our Villas' ... Hmmm I wonder who that could be ---

Train up a child in the way he should go - and when he is older he will not depart

John 6:9 -“Here is a boy with five small barley loaves and two small fish, but how far will they go among so many?”

This is the story of how Jesus fed 5000 people. But I recently heard a message ... actually part of a message where the preachers talked about this little boy who had the 5 loaves of bread and two pieces of fish. I am not sure how old this boy was  or whether he realized he would be part of an amazing miracle. The disciples brought him to Jesus under the assumption that he would be willing to give up his lunch!

I wonder who was the mother of this boy. I am sure if she had seen him give up his 5 loaves and 2 fish ... she would have been very proud. I wish she would take a class on parenting or give me some tips on how she raised her child to share so beautifully.

We live in the age  of  'Mine' - Isaac has said 'Mine' so often that if I had to give him spanking for it ... there would be time for nothing else. The art of hoarding our toys so no one else at the park plays with it has made this 'Mine' issue even worse. It takes it to the level  that Isaac not only says 'Mine' for his toys but also for toys that do not belong to him!

Being a mother there are those motherly instincts that arise in me when I want to protect my child when something is plucked from him. I have even made the mistake of interfering and helping Isaac out. I wish I had not ... but not doing so led to Isaac wailing. I do not want Isaac to be strong and pluck back - but I want to train him to just give up. After all we want him to realize that he is living for something much bigger than any of his material toys or possessions! I am sure when he knows and accepts the Lord Jesus he may automatically change his ways. But till then I am responsible for his heart. If I can just change his heart to realize  --- its not worth it.

The 'Mine' and plucking has reached such great heights that now brother and sister i.e. Isaac and Ziva are becoming pretty stubborn about giving up what they hold in their hands. Invariably Isaac wants what Ziva has and vice versa. Maybe I can just teach them the exchange offer.
 
Any other parents have any training suggestion - I would love to hear it.

It happens only in India

A friend of mine recently put up an 'only in India' - where she rushed her kids to school only to realize that school was closed due to a bandh (Rebecca Thomas)
I was thinking of all the 'It happens only in India' and I had a few good ones this week. As we were travelling back from Mumbai to Bangalore on Monday morning, we (Suresh, Kids and I) had a few good experiences!

Well to begin with we rented an Inova (mini van) since we had lot of luggage. The driver who was a friend of my sister's dad-in-law came 4:15 am. He called me on my cellphone ' Shall I come upstairs and help you with luggage?' ---'It happens only in India'

We arrived at the airport and after check-in headed to security check. In India the lines split at this point - ladies one line --- gentlemen another line ----'It happens only in India'.

I was pleased since the ladies line was short. I sent Isaac off with dad since I could not handle both the kids. (Isaac is not a gentlemen yet ---So he can be allowed in the ladies line). However I had forgotten that Indian women -- well we carry everything with us. And the short ladies line took a very long time leading to a very fidgety Ziva. I was trying to maneuver the stroller and my gazillion bags and control Ziva. About midway through Ziva decided to wander off a little - only to be stopped by a few friendly ladies playing peekaboo with her. One of them even helped me with my stroller. 'It happens only in India'. I must say that this was 6:45 am flight and all these women looked like professionals who I am sure would have rather been at home with their family. But here they  were willing to entertain my child.

As we stood for security check, the lady with the police uniform and a metal detector in her hand searched me and then moved to Ziva. She swept the metal detector over Ziva and then winked at her and pinched her cheeks before she stamped an OK on our boarding passes. 'It happens only in India'. Something about a kid in your hand makes everyone around friendly in India.
 

We had to take a bus from the terminal to the plane because there aren't enough runways in Mumbai. I dont know whether it was the travel to the plane or that it was 6:15 am but Suresh started complaining about how this was just too much ... blah blah .. blah. We reached the plane and realized that we had to climb up about twenty stairs. Two kids, a havasack, a laptop bag, a small carry-on and a stroller ! It seemed that we did not have enough hands for this. Right when we were discussing this
Me:' Suresh you take all the bags ... I will handle the kids and the stroller'
Suresh:'Ok'
Third person:(Whose face I do not remember now): ' Aaa .. yeh bag lekhe jao upkar -- aur yeh stroller pe tag lagao'  (Translation : Take this bag up and put a tag on the stroller)
Just like that in a few seconds we were left on a runway with two kids and nothing on us. Never felt lighter. I dont know if it was the airport staff or the airline staff who helped us - but Thank you very much. 'It happens only in India'.

As the flight took off and reached cruising altitude and the flight attendants started getting about their chores of serving food. 'It happens only in India'. One of the flight attendants came to me and asked 'Mam would you like the omelet of the idli -wada'. Me: 'The omelet please'. Flight attendant looking over at Isaac: 'And what about him'.  Me:' The omelet please'. She completely ignored Suresh and came back in 5 seconds with a tray of food for Isaac and me. Suresh looked over at me holding a sleeping Ziva and smiled. 'It happens only in India'. I have always wanted to get that special parking place at the mall that said 'For pregnant women' or 'For mothers with little children'. Thank you Kingfisher airlines for making me feel special by serving this mommy with her baby first!
'It happens only in India'. 

Mumbai Meri Jaan

‘Aye dil hai mushkil, jeena yahan
jara hat ke jara bach ke, yeh hai bombay meri jaan’

I lived in this city for 22 years before I left for grad school. There are lots of things in this city that annoy me.... the crowd ... the lack of lanes sense in the traffic ... etc ... but there are many more things I enjoy about this city called BOMBAY and then renamed MUMBAI. I love them both.
Though I am a Keralite by heritage … by birth I am a Mumbaiker. I was born to this city (and to my parents … poor guys didn’t know what they were in for) on what is called Janamstrami in Mumbai. Janmastrami is Krishna’s birthday apparently and therefore I got the name ‘Rohini’ for Rohini Nakstrtram (for though my parents were Christian they didn’t know better probably). Now 35 years later I celebrated my birthday again in this city. Well I was not in Mumbai but closer than I have been since my last birthday in 1999 which I celebrated here.
I got into an autorikshaw last week and I saw the glee on my son’s face as we rode in this crazy vehicle! I realized how much I had missed Mumbai. To top it all it is in the season that I love. (like I hate …like I love). Crazy rains have let down and there is a downpour every 5 minutes. It literally seems like the heavens open up and throw down buckets of water and then close up! I love it (like I hate it). Crazy rains remind me of first day at school, travelling in local trains as the rain hits your face and eventually gets you wet and autorikshaw’s bringing out these curtains that are supposed to protect you from the rain while they whiz past the traffic.  I love it! (like I hate it … like I love it)
I love the familiar places … Dadar … Goregoan … Vashi … Borivali and of course Bandra. I love that none of these names cause me to feel uncomfortable (like the unfamiliarity of Bangalore). I love that I am willing to venture into unknown areas and not be afraid that I will get lost … that I don’t need to pull out my GPS to direct me back home.
I love that the autoriskhaw charges me Rs. 19 and when I give Rs 20 … he actually gives me Re1 back. I love it that I pay Rs. 7 for a bus ticket and the conductor looks at my son and says ‘He’s not 3 yet right … well he rides for free!’ Love it!
I love that there is a local train at 11:17 and the next one is at 11:23. Love it!
I love it that people are friendly and willing to give you directions no matter which language you ask them in.
I love my mom’s flat that reminds me of our old place in Bandra. Our Bandra house overlooked an Arabian sea creek that everyone who came from Kerala swore smelt like dead fish. To me it just smelt like Home… Love it!
Suresh does not understand my deep down love for Mumbai. But he does agree that everyone who comes from Mumbai has a spell cast on them that makes them love this city. He once took a flight from Bangalore to Mumbai. As he sat in the bus that took him from the aircraft to the terminal he overheard a conversation.
First man: ‘Went to Bangalore for business’
Second man: ‘Oh ok’
First man: ‘Yaar but there is nothing like Amchi Mumbai’
Second man nods his head vigorously in agreement.
As sweat beads accumulated on Suresh’s forehead from the heat that had not subsided even at 8 pm in the evening and as he dreamt of cool Bangalore, he shook his head and thought ‘My wife would totally agree with you’.

jara hat ke jara bach ke, yeh hai bombay meri jaan
Love it like I hate it

Total time pass!

 It has been raining since the day we reached Mumbai and of course as the days go by Isaac has been getting more and more bored … leading to more and more whining and leading to more and more fighting with Ziva. Finally after one week of watching it rain and realizing that there was no place to take him that would not be wet I took matters into my own hand. It was time to teach my son to do ‘timepass’ … the Mumbai way … i.e. TOTAL TIMEPASS.

                                                     Isaac standing in from of the BEST bus stop

As you exit the gate of my mother’s building there is a bus stop. The bus no most common there is 240. There are a few more buses as I would soon learn. I did not know where 240 went but I did know that it passed via Borivali station. I got Isaac and ready on Monday morning. Put Ziva to sleep want left her in the excellent care of my mother and went down to the 240 bus stop. It has been a very long time since I have taken the 240 bus and so for the first 10 minutes Isaac and I stood on the wrong side of the road waiting for the bus. With every ticking minute Isaac got more and more impatient. ‘Where is the bus amma?’. Finally I asked a shop nearby and they directed me to the correct location. As we walked a bit and then crossed the road at the signal, I saw a 240 bus coming along. I picked Isaac and ran to the bus stop while waving madly at the bus. I don’t know whether it was my outlandish looks or the fact that I had a kid in my hand but the driver waited. We got in and even before could get a grip the bus jerked into gear and caused Isaac and me to swing around. Isaac rather gleefully, me a little annoyed. I think as adults we loose some of our sense of fun!

We sat down and I looked at the conductor (ticket giver) and said ‘One Bhagwati hospital and does he need a ticket’ pointing to a puny 2.5 year old who was way too thrilled! Conductor ‘How old is he?’ Me ‘Two’. Conductor ‘No ticket. Only after he is three. Seven Rupees’. I considered telling him that Isaac would turn 3 in one month but I had lost the conductor who had moved on to other travelers. Isaac sat at a window and since the seats were high he was able to see outside. We got off at our stop and I was contemplating some shopping and decided to check with Isaac. Me ‘Isaac what do you want to do now’. Isaac ‘I want to go in another bus!’ I looked down at his bright eyes and I thought oh well shopping could wait… today we would be doing some total timepass! We got into another 240 buses that came in 3 minutes and I said ‘Borivali Station’ assuming that would be the last stop. Conductor ‘Five Rupees’. We sat in the bus and I saw Borivali station come. The conductor came to me and said ‘This is your stop’. Me handing him money: ’I want to go back now’. Conductor looking rather confused. Me: ‘ Humlog ghumne ke liye nikle hai!’. He looks at me and then at Isaac and grins knowingly. He looks at Isaac and says ‘Maaza aa raha hai’ I felt like saying ‘I am not sure if he is having fun --- but I am’.

Tuesday my mom took Isaac for a similar round

Wednesday was my turn. I got into the bus and told the conductor ‘Shanti Ashram’. After my first round in the bus, I had figured out what the last stop. The conductor looked at me and full of wisdom said ‘Ek kaam karo … next stop pe uthra jao … 284 bus pakado … jaldi pochonch jaoge’ … (Do one thing – get off at the next stop and take bus no 284. You will reach quickly)

I looked at him and said ‘ Mujhe jaldi nahin pochanchne ka hai – Mujhe ghoomne ka hai’ (I don’t want to reach fast. I am out roaming)!

Loved the expression on his face and caught a few of my fellow travelers looking at Isaac and giggling.