Proverbs 31 : My attempt!

Proverbbs 31 describes a 'good woman' or  a ' good wife'. While I cannot claim to being either, there are a few things in these verses I accomplished in 2013 and hope to keep going at a few  more in 2014 ... God willing!

2013 began with almost nothing. No goals, no real drive ... just a slow lethargic life. Then somewhere around May it picked up and its been a whirlwind since then. It got so busy that  someone asked me if I had more than 24 hours in my day!
In May, after Isaac had finished summer camp, I realized there was so much I could do as an adult too ... in terms of extra curricular activities. In July 2013, I attempted my first art activity. Dry pastels with Artsy Craftsy.!!! It went so well that I never looked back. The thing about doing something is .....when you do it well... you want to do more. My products at the dry pastel class came out so well that I wanted to do more.

Around the same time one of my neighbours posted an ad for stitching classes. Thank you Vishaka Ganjoo for setting up class and inviting us all to it. Stitching was a completely crazy class ...lots and lots of home work. Crazy Wednesday drives. A pushy teacher (by the way I realised I do better with people who push me!). And some lovely fabric. By November, when I pushed myself to finish off the course, I had stitched something for almost everyone I knew!!! Well yes that's an exaggeration but I think my sewing machine wanted to take the long tailors ruler and smack me on my butt!.

In the midst of all this I did more art. Coffee painting ... I never knew coffee could be used as a medium. It was more fun this time since I dragged along with me neighbours and enjoyed the company of other adults ... something I had missed for a long time.

In August, I got a fantastic offer. Working from home had always been a dream. I always thought it was impossible for a Medical Physicist to work from home since the clinic is our life. But God does work in mysterious ways and by the middle of September I was putting in at least 20 hours of work a week and feeling mighty pleased. It was good to put my knowledge of medical physics into use.

Somewhere in the September, a post by a friends - friend on Facebook inspired me to want to compost. A little civic sense and hopefully something toward the environment. I started dumping my wet waste into my pots outside the house. Life takes interesting turns and twists.

The dump from my kitchen exploded into a tomato plant. When the first flowers started to show up and I saw the excitement on Isaac's and Ziva's face as the fruits came in, I realized I wanted to do more of vegetable growing ... just to see their faces as the produce appeared at home! I ordered a Daily Dump composting pot set and began my journey toward organized composting. I bugged Aparna George the (friend's - friend) for seeds and was inspired by her drive to go 'Organic' for her kids!

In the midst of all this we were still schooling at home! It seemed crazy but my level of patience with the kids was far higher even though I was busy and crazy.  The say an idle mind is the devils workshop ...and I believe I was able to keep the devil out!

I ended the year 2013 with a big bang. Christmas Baking. This is something  I am inspired to do from my mother. Every year for Christmas, she would bake a bunch of goodies for our neighbours. Nankatis, cake, acchapam. We would put it on a paper plate and distribute it to the neighbours. I hated going to each house at that time. But now I think that was a fun way of saying 'Hello' 'I am sorry' or 'Thank you' to the folks who live around you. It gave the new year a new beginning. This year I baked for a whole week and came up with 40 boxes of goodies for my friends and neighbours. Thank to Lavonne I was able to make close to perfect cupcakes with yummy Italian meringue buttercream

Suresh added this message to the top of the box and it was perfect!

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Christmas Love

God gave us the greatest gift possible. We needed it the most and deserved it the least. Jesus was born to save us from the penalty of all our wrongs in our life. He paid the consequences of our wrongs by dying on a cross, so we may be free.

Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends. - John 15:13

May Christ be born in our hearts this Christmas.
May we know His love for us.
May we show His love to others.

Love               
Suresh, Rohini, Isaac & Ziva

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Here is a link to Proverbs 31.

Here are the verses that inspired me this year

¹³ She selects wool and flax
    and works with eager hands.
¹⁴ She is like the merchant ships,
    bringing her food from afar.
¹⁵ She gets up while it is still night;
    she provides food for her family
    and portions for her female servants.

¹⁷ She sets about her work vigorously;
    her arms are strong for her tasks.
¹⁸ She sees that her trading is profitable,
    and her lamp does not go out at night.
¹⁹ In her hand she holds the distaff
    and grasps the spindle with her fingers.


²⁴ She makes linen garments and sells them,
    and supplies the merchants with sashes.

²⁷ She watches over the affairs of her household
    and does not eat the bread of idleness.
²⁸ Her children arise and call her blessed;
    her husband also, and he praises her:


Well my children really do not call me blessed! But when I stitch something and show Ziva I always get a 'Wow Amma so pretty' and  when I let Isaac pluck tomatoes or cut spinach I always get a 'Thank you Amma for gardening!'  and more recently 'Thank you Amma for drawing a Tiger for me!'

Suresh is my balance factor. Encouraging me to go on with anything I want to do ... making sure I do it well and stopping me when I seem to go crazy. For instance I saw a bunch of kids going for Table tennis practice and I felt like joining TT classes. I got a  'Yes because you don't already have enough to do' from Suresh!!! :)

Now if only I could get these verses in my system and I would be golden ;)
²⁵ She is clothed with strength and dignity;
    she can laugh at the days to come.
²⁶ She speaks with wisdom,
    and faithful instruction is on her tongue.

The importance of Craft in a pre-schoolers life!

About the beginning of March I had started annoying Suresh. 'We need to get Isaac into some activities!'
We had decided he needed to be exposed to music, art and athletics. He could then chose what he liked and pursue it to the fullest. With the decision set in on homeschooling Isaac, bringing these activities to him was an issue. I needed a good teacher.
We finally got Isaac into the skating class in the community. He fell on his butt several hundred times. He also did not survive the one hour class. About 45 mins in he would want to go home. But we could see him enjoying it. In May the skating teacher had his own college exams and took a break. I started getting all hissy again 'We need activities for Isaac'
I was determined to get him to start Art class somewhere. Mainly because I am inspired by sister's kids who take drawing class. Artsy Craftsy came at the right time as a blessing!
When I went I had it in my head that it would be all painting. I did not realize how much craft was going to be done.
Why is craft important?
Isaac is very good with the paint brush. Very good for his age that is. He does decent cut and paste pictures. He can write Captial Alphabets except an occasional 'S' being too difficult. I thought - my son -- great chap --- excellent fine motor skills. I was ready to move on.
We always think our kids are the best, the smartest, they know everything ... blah ... blah ...There is nothing wrong with thinking that. Believe me if we dont think that no one else will. We are the first phase of encouragement our children will get.

But the day I saw him turn wool round and round a plastic 'dabba' at Artsy Craftsy I realized there was so much more to fine motor skills! Every Craft project brought in a new challenge. Whether it was sticking foam on a coaster, molding the shapes for a shape mobile or sticking small squares to make a mosaic bird! But the biggest challenge was perseverance. Especially at the age of 3.5 its very easy to give up. Craft teaches you to persevere.

After rolling the wool a few times in one direction and then rolling it in the opposite direction (which essentially undid the wool on the plastic box) Isaac started to whine 'Amma you help me'. I guiltily helped him. In my head I kept telling myself not to help and played devil advocates with 'Oh he's only 3.5!'.
The last two days at Summer camp, Kanchan sat with the young kids and I helped out with the older kids. I am so glad! Half way through one session, I could hear Isaac's distinct whining. Kanchan prompted 'Isaac finish your card' ... Isaac 'No ... you help me' ... Kanchan 'No you do it by yourself ... I know you can'
I had my back towards them ... but I smiled... I was so tempted to look at what Isaac was doing. At the end of  craft, I asked Kanchan how much Isaac did on his own 'Well most of it ... he needed help in some parts'
 

Craft helps your fine motor skills. I was helping tie knots at summer camp and realized how much of an effort it was for kids. I felt Isaac more nimble at the end of three weeks.  Of course I need to keep finding him something to continue his skills and challenge him.

Craft helps build perseverance. All projects at summer camp had to be completed. Not one kid left with a half finished project. Every day someone needed help to finish up. But no one was left alone. It was also a different child every day! It made me realize how different kids were. There was also a sense of exhilaration at the end of art and craft session.
Exhilaration and exhaustion and they were all famished .... Perfect time for a snack to treat those nimble hard-working fingers.

Closing those doors!

I think today being March 23 2013 (It took me one month to write this blog -- today is in fact April 26th) and the official school year starting on June 4 2013, we have officially made our decision for Isaac  for the year 2013-2014.
Isaac will technically, according to his age, be in Nursery or Pre-K. And he will be homeschooled!
Yes after visiting 6 schools and weighing our options and even with the slight chance of me loosing my mind - we have decided on homeschooling our boy. We have also prayerfully decided that we will take one year at a time (Thanks to Shanthi and Faith for making me see that this was an option) and will revisit our decision next year and see if this is in fact the best thing for Isaac, Ziva and me.
How did all this happen? Well we started our school visits at the beginning of January. We visited 6 schools

Inventure Academy: This was a fantastic place and frankly if we lived closer, we would have sent Isaac here. But sending a 4 year old this far (17 km) seemed unfair to us. Maybe he will get used to it. Maybe we are hyper-ventilating a bit too much. But the distance to the school and a long day (8-3 pm) ruled it off our list. But I think if Isaac is going to school next year, it will be a no brainer pick of Inventure

Indus Early Learning center: I loved the place. Suresh did not. What I loved was the amount of creativity we saw in our 1/2 hour tour. Children were playing with hay and sand and having so much fun! But the fees were exorbitant which would probably be fine till Ziva was to got to school as well. Sending both of them to Indus would mean I would have to go back to work. Since Suresh did not like the place anyway, it was checked off our list.

Viha: This tiny place was not much to talk about. Just felt like any other small school/ day care facility. But the principle/ owner/ teacher was one dynamic lady. I was very impressed with her confidence in what she was doing and more importantly realized she was a no-nonsense person. In addition I had a brief view of her love for teaching. As we walked past the classes, I had seen her sitting on the floor, her back close to the black board with three kids sitting around her. She was teaching them phonics and you could see the passion in just the way she was pointing at the vowels and creating three letter words. The facilities at Viha were a little poorly maintained and after seeing places that are all yuppy, you wonder! So Viha got checked off our list.

Canadian Maple bear: This place seemed an O.K. Nice play structure. Nice class rooms. But two things put us off. One Isaac had a complete meltdown and would not calm down. To make matters worse the teachers and helps were overly nice. While I like nice people, I do not like people who encourage tantrums of 3 year old's by being overly nice! Another thing I noticed on our tour was a teacher grasping (probably gently) the wrists of a 4 year old. The child was not paying attention. I had a mental picture in my head of that child being Isaac a year later. I could not get my picture out of my head. I am allowed to hold my son's wrist and shake him to get his attention  ... but I do not give that right to anyone else. Canadian became a choice we would take if we had /must send Isaac to school and was slowly pushed to the bottom of our list.

Klay Schools:  We received an excellent review about this place and were all excited about a school we were almost sure we were going to send Isaac. But I realized that you like a place and approve it based on the person who takes you around. Unfortunately for us, the center co-ordinator was in-charge of showing us the facilities. She first told us to come at 1 pm and then called at 12:30 and changed the time to 2 pm. By this point I was already half way through and decided to pick Suresh up and then wait outside the school till 1:45. At 1:45 we slowly parked the car and picked a sleeping Isaac and walked into lobby. It was another 45 minutes before our conversations with the center coordinator began. I was pissed by this point since I was to be home by 3 pm to relieve the maid and take over Ziva. To add some further fume to the fury, the center coordinator was completely unprofessional. With a checked shirt rolled up past her elbows and leaning back and rocking her chair, she gave me the impression that she was sitting at a coffee shop across her college buddies. While I loved the facilities and what they were doing, I was completely put off by our point of contact. Another thing that made us uneasy was the lack of secular environment. While looking through the calendar I noticed that in January they had decided to celebrate Sankranti instead of Republic day. I mentioned that it was odd since I would think school would give more priority to patriotism than religion. I am of the firm belief that faith and religion should be things taught at home so it matches the environment you grow up in. The coordinator casually said that they choose one holiday in a month and celebrated it large scale (I understand choosing 'one', since India has so many holidays and festivals). She continued to says 'Well in March we will be celebrating Maha shivrathri. I asked how they celebrated it.
Her response: Well the kids do a pooja.
I was a little shocked - what do kids know about a pooja. I again had a mental image of Isaac chanting something he did not understand. She probably recognized the confusion in my face and quickly added 'In April, we are celebrating Easter'. Big mistake! I do not want Isaac thinking Easter is about Easter Eggs or bunny rabbits!

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At this point Suresh and I had this long conversation and the key phrase that I will keep in my head is Suresh's line 'What must I do to so you will homeschool Isaac?'
I think Suresh had realized that a major reason for me even thinking about school was the lack of appreciation within the home and the fear of ridicule from outside.
At the end of two or three days of conversation, we had almost decided on homeschooling Isaac for one more year. But we had one last school left to go see. I did not have much hope since most schools close admissions by January of the academic year. We were in the mid of March. But we had put in our admission forms and decided to go for the tour.
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Neev: Neev was  wonderful, small little place but used up so well. Lots of light and lots of arts and crafts. We felt comfortable with the place. One important happening at Neev were the other kids. Isaac was on the play structure and we were in the midst of our tour when the kids were let free for play time. One of the girls came up behind him on the play structure, probably about 2 years older than Isaac and asked him his name. As usual Isaac shied away. Then a couple more kids came and decided to be friendly and I responded for him 'His name is Isaac' All of them started squealing with joy. 'Like Isaac Newton'! For the first time Suresh and I both liked the place. Suresh made sure there were no religious celebrations that required participation (observation is fine is what he said) and he was assured that harvest festivals were the only things that were celebrated. Cultural knowledge is fine.

We seemed to have found a place and yet there was no peace! I seemed to have this feeling in my heart that something was being pulled out of me and taken away. Suresh just kept saying 'I have no peace'


That evening at family prayer Suresh prayed this way 'Lord close the doors that need to be closed!'

Had Isaac been rejected or denied admission from Neev, I would have been very upset. Instead the following day afternoon we received an email from Neev. 'Isaac has been wait-listed' Which meant he could probably get a chance to go to Neev mid-way through the year.
Doors closed!

I have never seen Suresh so elated. We were both afraid of the decision we would have to take if Isaac had been accepted. I think as parents we are always second guessing ourselves on what is good for our child. I thank God for closing those doors! (for this year at least)
Now to start praying for peace, patience, perseverance and joy in teaching Isaac and Ziva.



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A few days ago (April 4th 2013) we got a mail from Neev saying they had a seat available. Suresh and I politely declined. I ended my phone conversation with the sweet lady across the line saying 'Maybe next year'
I don't want to try and open something God has closed. I don't want to challenge the peace I felt when those are closed and the peace I feel right now.