I'm on Aslan's side even if there isn't any Aslan to lead it.

"Suppose this black pit of a kingdom of yours is the only world. Well, it strikes me as a pretty poor one. And that's a funny thing, when you come to think of it. We're just babies making up a game, if you're right. But four babies playing a game can make a play-world which licks your real world hollow. That's why I'm going to stand by the play world. I'm on Aslan's side even if there isn't any Aslan to lead it. I'm going to live as like a Narnian as I can even if there isn't any Narnia." --- Puddlegum ... Silver Chair --- C.S. Lewis

I recently met someone who told me they were an atheist and I wondered in my mind 'What causes someone to make this claim'. This person was one of the drivers who drove us in Mumbai and he even had a statue of a god on his dash which he claimed his wife had put there.

I quietly wondered about my personal walk with my personal savior. I wondered if this man had seen any miracles in his life. I wondered if he had felt any pain or had lost a dear one. If he had lost a dear one... I felt sad that he had no hope for another chance to see them or to know that we had the hope to all be together in eternity.

I have three main miracles/ struggles that have pushed me closer to God.
1. Isaac .... We struggled so much to have a child. The pain of being barren was too hard for me to bear alone. I knew no one --- not even another woman who had the same issues could understand what I felt. But there had to be someone who knew my pain the way I felt it and more importantly felt my pain.

2. My mother in law --- I have never met someone with so much faith. Coming from a non-christian background even to the very end she knew she was going to a better place. I have never met someone so prepared for death like as if it was news of her wedding day. I still remember when she was diagnosed with cancer she said ... 'I know where is it going to end ... do I really need to take chemotherapy'.   So much peace about the end. I do not think that peace can come from anyone else expect the one true savior. I always wondered how God could take this person away or cause her to suffer so much. But what I see right now is that we are not going away for ever ... just a separation for a little bit. Till He comes again.

3. Ziva --- When I conceived Ziva, it was to me the biggest surprise. We were in the middle of chaos. We had just lost one of the stronghold's of our life - Madras Amma. We were absolutely and totally alone in the US. We were struggling to manage our jobs and child and lives. And just like that God placed in our laps the best gift ever. I struggled to understand why at that time God had chosen to bless us. Today I see Ziva and it feels wonderful to have her in my life. I am so thankful.

This world is temporary and I have something much more to look forward to! And for that as Puddlegum says in the Silver Chair ... for that I believe in a better place with a Saviour I can call my own!